Do We Have To?
By Staff Writer
How to Involve Your Child with ADHD in Household Chores
Kids hate chores, and let’s face it – parents don’t love them, either. It’s hard for children to understand why chores are necessary, especially if your child has attention deficit disorder (ADD/ADHD), Asperger’s syndrome, autism, or any other form of learning disability. But household clean-up is an essential part of life and a skill parents can help teach their children.
Why Chores Are Important
Most experts believe chores are good for kids. Chores help children feel like they are an essential part of the family team, like competent individuals who can make real contributions to the household. Studies show that helping others promotes self-esteem, decreases feelings of depression and anxiety, and improves academic and social skills. A regular chore schedule also provides children with life skills, such as a sense of personal responsibility, a realistic view of how to run a household, and the ability to approach work with a good attitude and sense of commitment, which eases the transition into adolescence and adulthood.
Getting Children Involved Using Chore Wheels
Even though chores are important, parents are likely to face resistance from children who would rather watch television, hang out with friends, or even do homework than help clean the house. Luckily, help is available. The experts at Talisman’s summer camps for kids with special needs in North Carolina have perfected a system they have successfully used with kids with special needs for years. It’s simple, but yields real results. What is this miracle? Chore wheels.
Chore wheels are charts that list who does what chores and when. The chart takes up a small space on your refrigerator and is simple for kids to follow and understand. On the chore wheel you list what chores need to be done and when your child has to do them. Also have a checklist available so your children can keep track of what they have done.
When you decide to start using the chore wheel, it is important to provide specific instructions on how to do the chores and to make sure your child understands completely. Children with ADHD and learning disabilities will perform the chores more efficiently if you explain what to do in detail. Keep in mind your child is new at this – don’t expect perfection at the outset. If they “miss a spot,” gently point out the issue and congratulate their effort rather than immediately taking over. Kids tend to learn best through hands-on experience and trial and error.
For the first week, you may need to demonstrate step by step, and let your child help. Once she completes all the chores on her checklist, she should check in with you to make sure she completed all tasks properly. If not, give her feedback on the chores that still need to be completed (preferably without too much nagging or negativity). Throughout the process, be sure to show appreciation for her cooperation and praise her efforts.
Once all tasks have been finished and checked with you, get in the practice of offering positive feedback. Simply telling your child how well he did will encourage him to do a good job next time, too. Everyone (even kids) loves receiving compliments. Soon enough, chores will become a routine part of the day, and an accepted part of the household routine.
Assigning Age-Appropriate Chores
Before setting up your chore wheel, be sure you’re assigning your kids developmentally appropriate chores. Your child should be able to understand what needs to be done and be physically capable of completing the task. Start small and advance to harder chores over time. Making the bed, putting away belongings, or wiping off counters are great beginner chores. Once your child gets used to the routine of household clean-up, it will be much easier to convince him to take on larger tasks like doing the dishes.
Once your child adjusts to the chore routine, you will find that clean-up is much easier and more organized, leaving more quality time for you and your family. Clean-up time can be a family event – one that teaches your child responsibility and takes a few tasks off of your plate.